Forbes – The Executive Psychologist

The Hardest Part Of The Job Search (And The Secret To Get Beyond It)

Getting in front of decision-makers is the hardest part of the job search because it feels like it’s completely out of your control. Here’s how to create your own path for getting in front of decision-makers.

When I graduated from college in the mid-90’s, standard office supplies that I kept on hand included fancy resume paper, matching envelopes and plenty of stamps. Applying to a job was akin to mailing a personalized invitation to a formal event, so great care was taken to ensure the presentation screamed professionalism.

With the level of precision required, it was no wonder companies received far fewer applications and applicants took great care to choose wisely. Afterall, tailored cover letters were time-consuming and postage costs money.

So, you can only imagine how fantastic it was in the late 90’s when online job boards emerged and emailing resumes became standard. Now, two decades later, we can simply upload a resume, allow the Applicant Tracking System (ATS) to autofill our information (poorly, unfortunately) and skip the cover letter since it’s rarely required.

Is it any wonder that applications have skyrocketed and responses to candidates are practically non-existent?

The internet is saturated with more jobs than we can fully consider, more applications than a company can realistically process and more garbage than we’ll even realize.

Today, the average candidate only receives about a 2% response rate from online applications, which is more of a reflection of the inadequacy of our hiring systems, rather than the alignment of our qualifications.

Still, if you’re in a job search, these odds are depressing. Getting in front of decision-makers is the hardest part of the job search because it feels like it’s completely out of your control. You can actively build skills, earn certificates, prepare for interviews and research companies, but the opportunity to meet with someone who can help you progress to the next stage feels ambiguous and based on luck.

Here’s how to create your own path for getting in front of decision-makers:

Be focused: If your strategy is to throw spaghetti at the wall and see what sticks, this isn’t going to work. In order to stand out in a job search, you need to be targeted and invest in your audience, which can only be successful if you have a narrow focus. Reflect upon what problem you want to solve, research what companies are solving this problem that have a culture aligned with your values, and then build a brand (online, resume, network, etc.) using your strengths as the person who can solve this problem. Outcome: A list of at least 15 – 20 companies to target.

Be patient: This isn’t a quick process, but neither is completing 100 applications only to potentially get two interviews. However, this is an effective process. Once you have your list of companies, begin to engage your network, LinkedIn and online research to learn who the decision-makers are within these organizations. You may need to begin with peripheral connections (e.g., in adjacent departments, different geographies or even external vendors or past employees), which can help you learn more about the organization and expand your circle of connections related to it. Be genuine, curious and generous. Outcome: A broader network in connection with your target.

Be bold: As an introvert, I understand putting yourself out there (even online) can be scary. But what are the alternatives? Do nothing, get nothing, so acknowledge your anxiety, and have the courage to proceed anyway. Social media has created a simple way to both access and get noticed by decision-makers. As a first step, follow their content online and engage with it. Share, re-post and comment on content that resonates with you demonstrating your interest, expertise and support. Attend their LinkedIn Live events, subscribe to their newsletter, listen to their podcasts and take note of the information you learn about the company, individuals and mission. Over time, your engagement (if genuine and consistent) will be noticed and you can take the next step. Many people in my inner circle came from this strategy (either they followed me or I followed them). If you’re sincere, it works. Outcome: Build deeper relationships within your target network.

Be decisive: Once lost, time is one asset we can’t get back. So don’t waste someone’s time because you haven’t done your homework. At this stage, you’re ready to ask for a 15-minute phone call and if you’ve invested consistently and graciously, there’s a great chance you’ll get it. Prepare with the same vigor you would for an interview. Do your research, practice your introduction, and have 2 -3 insightful questions ready that this person is uniquely positioned to answer (e.g., don’t waste their time). Your contact likely knows you have an agenda, so don’t pretend that you don’t. Be clear up front about your goal and the information that would help you, which is likely learning specific points about their company, role, industry, career path, etc. Take notes, be curious and let them know you’d like to stay in touch. Outcome: The start of a long-term relationship with a potential decision-maker or referral.

Be proactive: Send a thank you note, connect on LinkedIn and follow their suggestions. If the meeting went well, they likely gave you a next step (e.g., join a group, read a book, take a course, etc.) and this is the perfect way to pivot to your next contact point. After taking their advice, send a note letting them know what value you gained from the action steps and thanking them again for their insights. You need to be the one to drive the relationship, so continue to engage with their content. And remember, networking is part art and part science. So, while you may be eager, don’t overdo it and risk coming across as desperate or clingy. While it’s okay to be a fan of their thought leadership and accomplishments, as a guidepost, consider your long-term goals (e.g., a job on their team) and position yourself as a professional colleague. Outcome: You’ll be more confident and begin to gain respect as a peer.

Be relational: Not every lead will turn into something, but the fact that someone cared enough to help in any small way is something to be appreciated. If you’re just looking for a stepping-stone to your next job, stop reading now. This is about building relationships, not being transactional. Someone you connect with during this process might be the person who hires you three jobs from now or you may be able to help them in some way. When you view networking as a long-term strategy in your professional journey, you create opportunities for a lifetime, not just a job in the moment. Even if you’re focused on a specific job search currently, recognize this will be one of many more searches, so treat your connections well. Outcome:Mutually beneficial relationships with decision-makers and contacts in your field.

Be resilient: Since networking is part art and part science, there’s no foolproof formula that works 100% of the time. Humans are complex, and even with the best planning, it’s possible to have poor timing or a bad day. You’ll make mistakes. You’ll miss opportunities. You won’t build a relationship with everyone, but track your progress, learn lessons and improve over time. The best networkers develop a strategy, and then are able to flex in response to the ongoing dynamics of the interaction. If you can learn to listen and tap into nonverbal cues, you’ll be able to respond in the moment and shift to meet the needs of the other person. That’s, in part, what building relationships is about. It takes two people, and those individuals come with their own values, interests and assumptions. Outcome: The more you practice, the more attuned you’ll become.

Be open: There’s a saying by Norman Vincent Peale: “Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.” Clarity comes through action, so recognize that while you have a clear career target, sometimes unexpected, yet related, opportunities emerge along the way. Consider these possibilities, as they might be exactly what you’ve been looking for all along. Outcome: Find meaningful work that aligns with your interests and values.

Happy hunting!

Rekindle Your Love For Your Job – Here’s How!

The intense high that results from an initial win is usually fleeting and rarely sustained without stoking. So, if you find yourself feeling bored or uninspired at work, before automatically jumping ship, here’s what you can do to rekindle the passion.

Hearts slowly fading in color on a white background

Some things in life need a little rekindling to keep the spark. Relationships might be the first thing to pop into your mind, but have you ever considered rekindling your job?

Excitement and enthusiasm are two emotions that are usually in excess when we’re starting something new that we’ve been after. Can you remember how elated you were when you received the offer at your current company? Perhaps you couldn’t wait to share the news and started to imagine your future commute, office environment and daily schedule.

Unfortunately, like most things, before long the novelty wears off. In busy times, it’s easy to get mired in obligations and forget what attracted us to something in the first place. Although you may still like your job, regular annoyances like difficult customers, repetitive tasks or budget cuts can lead you to wonder if it’s time to look for something new.

Although it’s possible the time has come to move on, in many cases, much of what we loved initially about the role still exists but has gotten routine or overshadowed by general frustrations.

Reminisce about the first time. Think about when you first learned that you got the job. Recall the excitement you felt and what specifically you were looking forward to. Perhaps it was the chance to make an impact in your field. Maybe it was the short commute allowing more time with your family or the opportunity to join an innovative company. Are these aspects still meaningful to you and if so, are there opportunities to enhance or recreate those? What may have come naturally at the start of the job may just take a little more initiative now, but you may be surprised by what interesting projects you can whip up with a little focus.

Spice it up. Once we master our role, it’s easy to develop routines, which enable us to be efficient, but also lead to monotony. Boredom can set in in any situation if we don’t initiate change. Learn a new skill. Shadow a department you don’t usually work with. Partner with a different team member. Attend a conference. Create a friendly competition within the department (e.g., Zoom bingo). Mix up your day. Start an office book club. The list for how you can infuse interesting or fun activities into your workday has endless options. And, it won’t only benefit your mental well-being, but could also boost your career.

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Be curious. While routines enhance efficiency, they don’t always enhance effectiveness. We tend to approach problems we’ve seen before like a hammer to a nail. While this can work a good portion of the time, it may also lead to mistakes, misunderstandings and missed opportunities. Next time a customer presents a problem, dig deeper to understand if you can generate more solutions, and maybe even offset this problem for future customers. Learn why standard processes are in place and look for opportunities to update, automate or modernize the steps. Just because something has always been done a certain way doesn’t mean there isn’t room for improvement.

Remove the hurdles. Have you ever dealt with a small annoyance day after day because you were too lazy to permanently fix it? For example, that perpetually loose door handle or the charger that needs to be at just the right angle to work? Those little frustrations add up, so while it may take effort to fix the root problem, it can make a big difference. For major disruptions, the solution may not be as straightforward. Perhaps a co-worker resigned and their workload fell to you? Maybe you’ve been asked to take the lead on a demanding client? Recognize some of these situations may be time limited. Seeing a light at the end of the tunnel can help, and putting a plan in place will help even more. Discuss the trade-offs with your boss, brainstorm alternatives and agree on a timeframe. Although these circumstances are unavoidable at times, having support can ease the burden.

Find balance. The spillover effect is a real phenomenon. What happens at work impacts your home life and vice versa. If you start to feel like you’re neglecting an important area of your life or not living according to your values, it will take a toll on other areas. Setting boundaries may be the answer. If you don’t want others to email you on weekends or expect responses at all hours, be clear about when you’re available and how to reach you if there is an emergency. If you struggle saying “no,” then get comfortable with responding, “I can tackle that project starting the first of next month” (e.g., a “yes” that doesn’t leave you swamped). Keep your boss informed so she can assist with prioritization when multiple deadlines arise. We often have many excuses why we can’t set boundaries, but in reality, everyone benefits when expectations are set.

Be realistic. Going into a new relationship expecting the honeymoon phase to last indefinitely will only lead to disappointment. The same is true for your job. In fact, the reason your position likely exists in the first place is so there is someone who can tackle the unexpected problems and keep their tasks in check so that a larger system runs smoothly. Seeing the importance of your role in relation to the larger organization may offer valuable perspective and meaning. Chances are, you’re not the only employee with responsibilities you’d rather delegate. But, part of the definition of a “job” (as opposed to personal time) is doing tasks you’d rather skip in exchange for compensation. When your expectations are realistic and you can connect your work to the relevance in the broader company, you tend to be more satisfied overall.

Savor the good moments. The brain tends to focus on negative experiences because these will presumably protect us from making similar mistakes in the future. This is useful, but may mean you have to be more intentional about identifying silver linings and celebrating wins (even small ones) to maintain a balance. When you feel frustrated or overwhelmed at work, take a moment to reflect on a few positives, or remember why you’re in this role in the first place. And when you experience something good, pause to relish the feeling for a moment before tackling the next problem. Over time, these brief moments of presence will become more natural and your perceptions more balanced.

Even if you make the effort to consciously focus on these actions, there will come a time when it’s best to move onto your next role. And, you’ll always be more successful if your primary motivation is to run to a job that’s exciting and has meaning rather than if you run from a role that was draining and frustrating. So, embracing these steps may not only make your current job more pleasant, but also set you up for success in your next job search.

Happy hunting!

Science-Based Strategies To Boost Your Mood When Pandemic Burnout Strikes

As we’re moving toward the one-year mark of the pandemic, it may be time to admit that we’re not okay.

Unemployed businesswoman depressed sitting on a path due to company bankrupted while coronavirus … [+] spreading situation

As we’re moving toward the one-year mark of the pandemic, it may be time to admit that we’re not okay. Some days are fine, but many people are quietly suffering, overwhelmed by conflicting news stories, stifled due to sheltering at home, and frustrated talking about planning plans that can’t be planned (still).

It’s cold, we’re weary and unmotivated. Despite this, we muster a “hanging in there” response when asked how we’re doing, skipping “by a very thin and tattered thread,” which reflects more accurately how we feel.

Many have experienced the hardships of layoffs, pay cuts and furloughs. These circumstances are extremely difficult during normal times, never mind in a pandemic that’s created a volatile and highly competitive market.

Our jobs are our livelihoods. They provide structure and meaning and shape identity. For many, work is the basis of social relationships, mental stimulation and physical activity. So, it’s understandable how long-term unemployment or a major change in work circumstances can have a devastating impact, and a spillover effect into other areas of our lives.

If this resonates, you’re not alone. Even the most resilient individuals are experiencing the impact of pandemic burnout. While there are rarely quick fixes, there are several research-backed techniques that can help.

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Don’t dismiss your feelings. Compartmentalizing emotions can be a helpful coping mechanism on occasion, but feelings will wait patiently to be addressed. While finding silver linings can help balance negativity, dismissing your own emotions because “others have it much worse” just compounds the problem, making you feel both sad and guilty. Take care of yourself: Acknowledge your anger, loneliness, sadness or anxiety. Ask yourself what you might advise a good friend to do when feeling this way, and then take your own advice. If bad days come and go, simple re-sets may be enough. Give yourself permission to chill out in your PJs with Netflix. Spend the afternoon with the book that’s been sitting on your nightstand. Ask a neighbor to watch the kids for a few hours while you grab a nap.

Foundation is key. While some advice is easier said than done, there is much evidence that the basics like good sleep, a balanced diet, daily movement and supportive relationships account for a great deal of well-being. It’s true that many of our habits have changed in the last year in response to the pandemic. However, if your coping strategies are doing more harm than good, it may be time to revisit them. Get back to the basics: Identify one area to change and start there. Trying to make multiple changes simultaneously may cause all of them to flounder. Set a timer to get up and stretch or do some quick squats every hour during the workday. Trade-off unhealthy beverages with water twice per day. Have a telehealth meeting with your doctor about how to improve your sleep hygiene.

Baby steps. When depression takes hold, sometimes even the most basic things seem incredibly daunting. Facing the day with a lengthy to-do list can feel overwhelming and exhausting. Research shows that breaking down large goals into smaller chunks helps you to accomplish them. You can use this strategy to inspire energy when things feel formidable. Break it down: Commit to a task like working, cleaning or exercising for only five minutes, then stop if you like. Most people will keep going, and the reason this works is because the brain is “tricked” to get past the hardest part, which is usually getting started.

Connect (or isolate). There are few “one-size-fits-all” techniques that work for everyone, so tune into your needs and take steps that work for you. While research shows that connecting with supportive people in our lives can boost our moods, sometimes we require quiet space to reset. Having supportive relationships in your life that you know you can count on is different than interacting constantly. Honor your needs: If the Zoom meeting with friends is energizing, bring some conversation starters and enjoy. If you need an evening off from online interactions, phone calls and text messages, take it.

Help someone else. Research shows that helping others actually does a lot to boost our own mood. Whether you feel comfortable volunteering in-person or are looking for opportunities that can be completed from your couch, there are many options to choose from. Create some joy: It doesn’t matter if your preference is finding a formal opportunity on a website like VolunteerMatch or offering to shovel your neighbor’s walkway — volunteering gives you purpose and structure. Small niceties like mailing greeting cards or baking for a friend can engage your talents and make someone’s day, while also returning the emotional favor.

Do one thing differently each day. This is one of my favorite solution-focused techniques. Whether stuck in a career rut or struggling with cabin fever, the act of intentionally choosing to do one thing differently each day gets us out of a rut and forces our brains to stop over relying on habits that may be contributing to our negative feelings. Make change a habit: Sit at a different place at the dinner table. Brush with your non-dominant hand. Watch a new program. Try a new recipe. It really doesn’t matter what it is or how long it takes. The conscious act of mixing things up will enable you to see the world from a different perspective, which may lead to creative ideas and interesting discoveries.

Get support. There’s a reason that mental health professionals have seen a massive uptick in the request for services. We all need extra support in these unprecedented times. In the same way we’re taking precautions around our physical health by wearing masks, social distancing and staying home, it’s equally important to be proactive about our mental health. Find help: Support comes in many forms – a therapist, career coach, clergy, friend, mentor – and most of us engage with a variety of these supports at different times throughout our lives. The world we live in is complex, and rarely predictable. The events of the past year have proven that. Most services are available via telehealth, phone or even text, and offer a variety of reasonable payment options. If you are looking for a qualified mental health professional in your area, please check these resources: NAMI, SAMHSA, TalkSpace.

One of my personal favorite ways to quickly de-stress is to relax my face. It may sound strange, but when I stop what I’m doing occasionally to tune into my body, I often find that my jaw and fists are clenched and my shoulders are tight, even though there’s no rational reason. Our bodies often recognize our emotions before our brains, so it helps to pay attention.

Happy hunting.

Why It’s Easier To Get A New Job When You Have A Job (And What To Do If You Don’t)

When given the option, it’s best to find a new job before leaving your old one. However, we’re not always given this choice, and many have learned this firsthand over the past year. If you find yourself unemployed and looking, here’s what you can do.

abstract 3d digital concept people’s need a job

You’ve likely been given the career advice not to resign from your current job before securing a new role. But why? Well, there are two primary contributing factors for this:

The hiring process is about elimination, not selection. At least initially. Most posted jobs receive hundreds of applicants, so an Applicant Tracking System (ATS) is used to whittle down the list to a more manageable number. About 25% of resumes make it to human eyes, but even at this stage, the process is still focused on reducing the number of candidates to a reasonable number to interview. Unfortunately, some employers view unemployment as a red flag and utilize this to cut you from the list.
Hiring is highly biased. Even when smart technology is used, it is programmed by humans, who by nature are biased, often unconsciously. Assumptions are made based on incomplete information or previous experience, which can negatively impact applicants. Research shows that employers discriminate against jobless candidates and tend to rate employed applicants higher on hireability. Also, the longer a person is unemployed, the lower the chances of getting an interview.

So, when given the option, it’s best to find a new job before leaving your old one. However, we’re not always given this choice, and many have learned this firsthand over the past year.

If you find yourself unemployed and looking, here’s what you can do:

Maintain your brand. Whether you’re earning a paycheck or not, your brand is never “between jobs” or “currently searching” when introducing yourself or on social media. If you’re networking (and you need to be), people will ask where you work or what you do, and you may be tempted to immediately relay that you’re currently unemployed – don’t. Instead, clearly share the value and outcomes you provide to your target audience, including a relatable accomplishment for credibility. Of course, you can also share you’re currently looking for new opportunities, but that should be secondary, once you begin to establish the relationship and share an understanding of what you offer as a professional. Your skills, abilities and worth don’t diminish just because you’re not employed for a period of time.

Don’t spend 100% on you job search. This may seem counterintuitive at first. While it may be tempting to focus all your spare time looking for a job, this will lead to burnout and there are other activities that can contribute to this goal, while also building your marketable skills and network. Earning a relevant certification, volunteering at a community non-profit or working part-time on a side hustle can all be beneficial to your job search, marketability and mental health. In addition to providing you with some structure, which can be invaluable, you will build your connections and gain valuable skills. Employers will want to know that you’ve spent an employment gap being intentional. There is a different vibe that comes across when you speak about this time in a manner that has purpose and focus. So, whether you’ve spent this time homeschooling your children, caring for an ill family member, or taking on a leadership role in an industry association, these activities will boost both your mood and your candidacy.

Address your demons. A layoff or unexpected unemployment of any kind can have a huge impact on confidence and lead to feelings of anger, anxiety or grief. Denying it just means it will take longer to resolve and more forward. Worse, these emotions will seep through when networking and interviewing negatively impacting your success, even if you believe you’re doing a good job concealing them. Combine that with the fact that attitude and likability play a large role in getting hired and being successful, you’ll understand why bringing negativity into the job search process will most certainly delay the outcome. Although you may feel the need to rush into a job search, taking space to process what happened, reflect on your goals and regroup will likely propel your job search rather than set it back.

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Practice your story. Although many people you know seem to have a linear career path based on their resumes, most people have professional trajectories that look more like a series of zigzags than a straight line. Careers often unfold through a series of both intentional and unexpected discoveries, good and bad decisions, and life happenstances that derail or boost our professional goals. The idea that anyone has an uninterrupted employment history without a few bumps is a fantasy, and is becoming even more rare as the future of work significantly shifts supply and demand in the marketplace. What’s most important is that you continue to reinvent yourself and your career story to align with the needs of the market and your audience. This doesn’t mean fabricating untruths, but rather organizing your history in a manner that shows how your relevant abilities solve problems in the current market and leaving out the parts that no longer make sense in the current ecomony.

Own it. If you work for any length of time, you will inevitably experience a layoff, employment gap or other unanticipated career hurdle. This is not something to be embarrassed about or apologize for, it’s just par for the professional journey. When networking or interviewing, avoid overexplaining the situation, which can sound defensive. If asked, speak about it neutrally and briefly, then move on to the value you bring to the marketplace or company. You’ll likely find many hiring managers who’ve been in the same place as you, who can relate to the situation. So, when you demonstrate that you can take setbacks in stride, build a plan and move forward, they’ll quickly forget about the topic and be more interested in discussing how you can contribute to their strategic goals. The storyteller directly impacts the level of drama conveyed, which means you wield the power of the messages your audience receives.

Get social. There’s s stigma associated with unemployment that tends to cause many job seekers to retreat from their networks, especially as time goes on. Resist this urge. In my TEDx Talk, I discuss the job search as a social activity, and one that all professionals will be engaging in every few years as the marketplace shifts towards “tours of duty,” skills continue to have a five-year halflife, and machines become our coworkers. Changing jobs, switching careers and reskilling are becoming increasingly commonplace, which means that exchanges about professional goals will be standard at the dinner table, holiday parties and social gatherings. This is a huge benefit as people can help one another get connected to opportunities and fill gaps in their own companies. Be focused and targeted in your message, making it easy for others to help you. And, don’t underestimate those closest in your inner circle. They’re your biggest cheerleaders and need to understand your goals, target and brand to assist, so be sure to share them clearly.

The good news is that the pandemic of 2020, which impacted tens of millions of jobs has caused recruiters to rethink unemployment and have a more open point of view, recognizing that these situations are unavoidable at times. However, it’s tough to predict if this perception will last as the market rebalances. The steps listed above will continue to bridge the gap regardless of the economy.

Happy hunting.